By Cookie Cuttre
Staff ‘burbs Writer
TRANSYL-VEIN-IA HILLS -- A new batch of kids has been snatched up out of the human world and placed into the Trick-or-Treat Wargrounds in Trick-or-Treat Tract for monster training. This pesky group of know-it-alls, according to sources, is said to be less frightened by scary things and more like what monsters can expect come Halloween night.
In years past, the breed of brat brought to the Tract have been frightened too easily, and monsters have gone into the human world with low expectations, thus they’ve had a difficult time making them scream, run and/or pee in their costumes.
“The trick-or-treaters we got this year are state-of-the-art tricksters, up to date on all the latest horror trends, and as mischievous and snarky as all get out,” said Jan, the gorgon at the front desk in the Trick-or-Treat Wargrounds office. “Monsters are really gonna have to up their game, but they’ll be thankful when they get into the real human world and are able to handle this new generation of germs.”
The trick-or-treat trials began last night at the Wargrounds. Monsters definitely agree about this year’s youngsters. Most of the ghouls and goblins gave up after just two rounds of pestering by these little jerks, and about two-thirds of the monsters announced they wouldn’t be going into the human world for Halloween after all. They up and called it quits for good.
“These kids today are vicious,” said a boogeyman who wishes not to give his name. “They're not like they used to be. I’m better off staying on Monster Island with bloodthirsty mermaids, skeleton warriors, evil trolls and Kong himself.”
More trick-or-treaters are being dumped into the Tract this afternoon for tonight’s trials. See Jan at the Trick-or-Treat Wargrounds office for your chance to get a look at what you’re up against this Oct. 31.