WEREWOLFTOWN -- Maleva’s once popular fortune-telling tent in the Gypsy Village, which had previously shut down decades ago following the death of the old gypsy woman’s son (who was a werewolf and died at the hands of a customer with a silver-headed wolf’s head cane), has re-opened its flaps for business.
The attraction offers paying guests a look at their futures. And then you’re chased out of the village and into the woods, at which point you get to experience a final showdown with not one, but three werewolves.
“My son used to do all the werewolfing on his own,” Maleva told reporters yesterday evening before opening the tent for the first time in over 70 years. “When he died, I knew I’d never replace him. He put the werewolf’s curse on so many guests with such style. I finally decided to open up the tent again, offer fortune telling, and I thought about having two lycanthropes chase down guests just to compete with my son’s numbers. After doing the math, I realized three was the magic number.”
In Werewolftown, the wolf bane is always in bloom, and the moon is always full and bright.
We’re Always Open, the sign reads in front of the gypsy tent.
So step right up and see your future. And then get mauled by werewolves. It’s in the cards.